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Welcome to Supreme Court Idol!
January 30, 2017  | By David Hinckley  | 1 comment

Before he announces his Supreme Court nominee on live TV Tuesday night, President Trump might want to have someone on his staff Google Megan Walker.

I don’t mean so he can nominate her. She’s still a senior in a Virginia high school, and she doesn’t want to reinstate the Dred Scott decision, so obviously she’s not a candidate.

No, Mr. President, this is about the balloons.

It’s about maximizing the potential drama of the moment, something this president clearly knows the value of doing.   

Let me explain where Megan Walker (left) fits in.

Walker is the consensus No. 1 women’s basketball recruit in the high school class of 2017. She’s a 6-foot-1 wing, great athleticism, can do it all.

So for the last three years, maybe more, the women’s basketball world has been waiting to see which college program she would pick.

By the middle of last year, she had revealed her three finalists: the University of Texas, the University of Connecticut, and Notre Dame.

On Nov. 10, the day after The Donald became the president, a table was set up in Walker’s high school gym with three clusters of balloons: orange for Texas, blue for UConn, green for Notre Dame.

She walked out and popped the orange and green balloons, leaving the blue. UConn was the winner.

It was beyond brilliant. It was great, as President Trump is fond of saying, and he’d be crazy not to go to school on it.

Besides, everything except the balloons is already in place for him. Like Walker, he’s already down to three finalists, in his case Neil Gorsuch of Colorado, Thomas Hardiman of Pennsylvania and William Pryor of Alabama.

Now yes, he could solemnly announce his choice, like every other president has done with every other Supreme Court nominee. Boring.

Or he could bring all three of them on camera with him. Each could be holding a balloon with the color of his home-state university football team.

President Trump could then explain his reasoning, the way he used to do on Celebrity Apprentice, talking about where each candidate had shown strengths and weaknesses.

Music could swell in the background, the way it used to do on the American Idol finale when Ryan Seacrest would ask each finalist what was going through their minds as the big announcement neared.  

I see Ivanka Trump in the Seacrest role, by the way. She’s really good on camera.

Then, with a flourish, President Trump could walk in front of the finalists and pop the balloons of the two who aren’t getting it.

There would then be a rolling round of applause from White House staffers while Trump said a few nice things about those two, like how they may be losers, but they gave it their best shot.

Ivanka could give them a consolation prize, like a half-off coupon for a weekend at a Trump resort, while President Trump posed for a victory shot with the winner and blasted it out on Twitter.

Where is there any possible downside here?

Now, okay, some people might say it all sounds a bit undignified for the Supreme Court, an institution that doesn’t let television cameras inside the room and for more than 200 years has maintained a judicial remove from the swirling drama of secular politics.

That’s so cute.

But they might want to notice that it’s now a balloon world.

Pop, pop.

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I was waiting for Trump to appoint himself to the vacant Supreme Court seat. As well as all Cabinet positions. While remaining President. After all, The Donald can do it all, can't he?
Feb 3, 2017   |  Reply
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