Frozen Hell! Flying Pigs! Peaceful Middle East! My Smothers Brothers Book Is Done!!
It's been 15 years since I conducted my first interview for my book on the Smothers Brothers, and over a year -- May 1, 2008 -- since my 100-page proposal sold the idea to Simon & Schuster/Touchstone, for a book to be published this November.
This morning I emailed the final chapter to my astoundingly patient, but understandably nervous, editor. I have been researching and writing this thing FOREVER, and now I can surface from solitude and begin to reclaim what's left of my life. For an exclusive first peek at the manuscript over which I've been toiling since 1994, read on...
A First Look at DANGEROUSLY FUNNY:
The Uncensored Story of
'The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour'
By David Bianculli
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play
work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes
and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack
no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a
play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull
makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.
Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work
a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and
dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no
boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play
work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes
and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack
no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a
play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull
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DAVID BIANCULLI
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CONTRIBUTORS
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Ed Martin's TV Mix
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Altered Reality
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The Son Also Criticizes
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Is the rest of your book as witty as this excerpt?
Can't wait..
Uh oh - Here's DAAAAVIDD! REDRUM REDRUM REDRUM - Can't wait to read the whole thing!
So go play already! Congrats!
Congratulations David! Wonderful news for all of the Smothers Brothers fans who have been looking forward to your book - but will we now need to wait until January 2010 to read it (as posted on Amazon.com)? Say it isn't so... (It isn't so. I think. I think we're forcing this to be born in November, as scheduled. We'll see... -- David B.)
No, I don't believe you...I'm sure there will be re-visions or Extra stuff for the Paperback...then there's the interviews, Book tours & signings, there will be consultant hours spent on sets when someone makes a movie...then the DVD commentary...then the commentary on Re-Release of the TV shows on DVD...Webcasts about the 'pathos' of the success of SB...Your kids will have to answer questions years from now about YOUR thoughts on "Smothers.."
Why??....Cause you finished the book. Now, it's out there and it'll never go away. So what are you going to do to celebrate??
Will you Boil some Cabbage down?
Fall in a vat of Chocolate?
Just don't celebrate by putting 3 X's the recommended amount of explosives in your drum kit?? Like YOUR Generation.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijRh-Qpv2gM
Good Luck with the new Book......Take it Bianculli....You're supposed to 'take it'.
Hmmm...this is like 'No Country for Old Men'..
I know I'm supposed to get it, but I don't...
Can hardly wait for the book though, any contests on the horizon to get a signed copy?
(yours, of course!..)
(I'l let someone else explain this joke. Already, the mention of REDRUM in an earlier comment should be a good clue, and be shining some light upon my little Extra joke. As for giving away a book. Why bother, when there are still chocolate gavels from YU BE THE JUDGE to give away? -- David B.)
YAY!
Tease! And there better be a book tour with signings ;-)
Now, I concur-GO PLAY!
Does this mean I'll see you at the next Fab Faux show? I know I'll be seeing you on Fridays again, Doughnut Boy. (Just so everyone knows: This is how esteemed public radio folks speak to one another. And yes, my Smothers sabbatical is over, and yes, I'll be hosting the show this Friday, and for many Fridays thereafter. And, sigh, yes, I'll bring doughnuts. Mmmmmm... Doughnuts.... Oh, and yes to the Fab Faux, too. -- David B.)
In 1994:
#1 TV Show -- Seinfeld
#1 Song -- "The Sign" by Ace of Base
#1 Book in June -- "The Celestine Prophecy"
#1 Box Office film -- "Forrest Gump"
It's about damn time.
And congratulations.
(Michael -- Thanks. And okay, you're right, I've taken a long time to get to this point. But I've been "free" for two hours, and it feels... giddy. -- David B.)
Give me the bat, David. Give me the bat.
You know, David. My lawyer will be contacting you.
Re: Flying Pigs, Frozen Hell, etc. I might have gone with:
Ben Silverman apologizes for I'm a Celebrity, Glen Beck apologizes for pretending to know what he's talking about and Maury Povich apologizes for everything.
(I would say your email had me FOTFLOL, except I hate those texty abbreviations. Except for one old-fart complaint I'm willing to start using, whenever I complain about texty abbreviations: GOML! Which means Get Off My Lawn!
But thanks. You know my pain. -- David B.)
Congratulations! The introductory chapter looks familiar but I think it was Pete Seeger who once said "plagiarism is basic to the folk process." I look forward to reading the book and I hope you make it to Austin on your book tour. (Me, too. And believe me, you'll hear it here first. My "public appearances" part of this site has been unchanged since the 2007 launch,because I haven't GONE anywhere! -- David B.)
Ohhh...I get it....
Jack Torrance's 'decent into insanity..'
I seem to remember Homer Simpson's take....
"No TV and no beer make Homer go crazy" written all over the walls.
Congratulations on finishing the book...it should be huge...
Congratulations on your new-found free time...
I imagine it must feel like the day after your last final in college....like you should be cramming for SOMEthing...!
Great job, look forward to the hardcopy...
(Thanks! I'm heading to the liquor store right now, in search of some single-malt Scotch that's older than I am. Or maybe I'll just get some 18-year-old, and pour it into three shot glasses. -- David B.)
So you got it done, congratulations. It seems half the reporters you used to work with at the Beacon are writing books, the sports guys are the most prolific, especially writing about the Indians, the Browns or the Cavs, they have a built in audience.
I'm looking forward to reading the book.
....Ott
(Hi, Ott! Wow! Tell everyone there who remembers me I said hi. That ought to take you, oh, about 10 seconds, when you can find the time. I'm glad you're one of them! - David B.)
Dad, Congratulations on finishing your book! We are so proud of you!!
Here are some things you may have missed since you began working on it back in the 90's:
America Online
Monica Lewinsky scandal
Viagra
Dolly the sheep is cloned
Y2K
"The Rachel" haircut
# of US cell phone users grow from 10 million to over 162 million
3 US Presidents (two terms for Clinton AND Bush...)
8 Olympic Games
International Space Station is built
5 Cher "farewell" tours
6 Bond movies
Nelson Mandela elected president of S.Africa
Ellen comes out
4 new Supreme Court Justices (soon to be 5)
Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Friends, and ER debut
TWO wars in Iraq
Grunge music
OJ Simpson trial
WE LOVE YOU!!!
(Hey, you guys -- Love you too. What a great list.
And hey, didn't my porch catch on fire somewhere in there, too?
Thanks for being happy for me. I'm happy for you as well.
See you next time I head West. Have fun in Italy. I plan to...
--Love, Dad)
Congrats cousin Dave, who is jack? (Go rent Stanley Kubrick's version of Stephen King's "The Shining." If you don't know Jack, so to speak, you will, and you'll get the joke by the time the movie's over. -- Cousin David... Geez, it's a family reunion around here all of a sudden.)
Who are the Smothers Brothers
(Et tu, Rich? But just think of this: I started working with you at the New York Daily News the same year I started the book. Now THAT's frightening. -- David B.)
I don't remember what year Mark lit the porch on fire...but I can tell you for sure that I kicked off the spring of 1994 with my Beatles wig bonfire in the front yard. I'm so extremely happy for you! But I have to say that I'm sure going to miss having my 4:00 a.m. phone call buddy. I don't know anyone else who works the hours we do. What is it they say happens to misery when it doesn't have company? (whatever you do, please do not reply with "and then you die.") I really can't believe it's finished -- I am so incredibly proud of you. Please take a few days and savor this moment. Drink some scotch, go in the hottub, get a full eight hours of sleep, and wake up without your eyes burning!!!! I love you!
(Thanks, sweetie -- I'm on such a different schedule now, I didn't even READ this to post it until the next morning. And what does it say, now that you remind me, that both my kids have pyromaniac pasts?
I hope, even though you've gone from pyro to attorney, that YOU get a chance soon to stop and smell the roses -- or, at least, the syrup-covered mop heads, which you were "smoking" outside to turn into Beatle wigs. Perhaps it's my fault for not explaining that the phrase "mop tops" was not to be taken seriously.
Meanwhile, press on. Sleep, like money, is overrated. And thanks, Kris, for taking the time to post and congratulate me. I KNOW you didn't have the time. -- Love, Dad)
Dave,
I knew it all along! If the excerpt is anything like the rest of the book...well I can't wait. Seriously, the family is happy for you, and so proud of your accomplishment. Take some time to enjoy the moment. We are glad to see you surface again. Sing it with me...We all live in a yellow submarine...
Thanks for the ride!
See you in Italy!
Claud
(Glad you made it home safely. Thanks for the encouragement -- and the Beatles sing-along. -- David B.)
With the pressure off , How will you keep from floating upward...I am sure the book will be well worth the wait !! Congrats! Love, Kelbe
(Thanks, sweetie -- And I can see, by your early-early-morning post, that things are just as busy for you, too. As expected. -- Love right back, David)